Lately I’m having so many conversations about what it takes. What it takes to achieve your dreams, how to understand if you’ve a chance to achieve what you want, when it makes sense to pursue your goals.

Now, if you ask me, the answer to that is: always. It makes always sense to pursue your goals and stay connected with what keeps you alive, stimulated and motivated. There’s no question about that.  If the question is if you can make a living doing what you’re really passionate about, well, this is a different question. But whether you can transform your passion into your business or not, you shouldn’t quit your passion.

I know how people can be discouraging about that. Before starting The Brave Hearted I had so many conversations that ended up with suggestions about being realistic, with people telling me how traditional business works and all the limitations of the current economy. We all know that and it doesn’t necessary help to hear it again and again. It helps to take pen and paper and make a plan about everything that needs to happen to make your project work. And when I say “make it work”, consider that a big part of it is defining the final goal and how you’ll measure your success. Questions like these ones are a good starting point:

  • What do you expect and in how much time?
  • Is your timeline realistic?
  • What are the obstacles you can expect to find on the road?
  • How many obstacles are you willing to overcome to make it happen?
  • Are you willing to do some work on yourself to advance?
  • What are your expectations about this project?
  • What is the reason behind it?
  • What do you hope to get out of it?
  • Will it be your source of satisfaction or your main source of income? Or both?

DARE TO DREAM, DARE TO ACHIEVE

In the end, achieving your dreams is a matter of clarity, consistent work, perseverance, patience and above all staying connected with your desires. Especially the last one. The energy and excitement that comes from focusing your mind on what you want can keep you going for a long time and give you the determination you need to make things happen. And in the process to transform a dream into a goal, you can test things out, see if you’re on the right path, adjust, learn and grow. It’s a wonderful chance and one of the most accelerated path to self-development.

Because when you are committed to something – and I mean truly committed – you spread a new vital energy. You can feel it’s right for you, aligned with your values, your mission and who you want to be in your life. It’s real motivation, not the empty kind of motivation we’re so used to. It’s the ultimate commitment, because it happens in your heart and it’s worth more than any other contract.

Well, I see many women stopping just some steps before that. Many of them talk about their projects with sparkling eyes and spreading that special energy around. It’s there. Then they start listing all the reasons why it can’t work. I’ve heard many saying that in the end, they don’t even dare to dream about it, because they know they can’t have what they want. And my question here is: is it true?

Detaching from your desire is a strategy to avoid the struggle of making your dreams happen and avoid a potential risk of failure. But it’s useful only if you don’t want to achieve your dreams. I see women all the time disconnecting from their desires. Telling themselves and others that in the end, they don’t want it that much. Or that it’s unrealistic, you know, let’s be real. And I get it. I know the fear, the potential risks, the consequences of failure, the consequences of success and what happens when you make yourself visible, when you stand up for something.

It’s even more difficult if you are transitioning from a corporate job to the so-called alternative business. It may feel like a risky coming-out (fear of being rejected, anyone?). But then let’s forget for a moment the expectations of immediate success. Let’s consider life in a different perspective. Forget today, the pressure of showing that you made it, that you achieved some sort of success with your idea. Consider your life when all these contextual people and situations won’t be there anymore. When you’ll look back and see what you did with the time you got.

What will matter then? When the opinion of these guys around you, that seems so important today, won’t matter anymore? What would you be proud of then?

This is what I mean. Don’t disconnect. Don’t detach.  

Disengagement is never the solution. It may look easier, but it isn’t easy when you wake up in the morning and you get ready to spend the whole day doing something you don’t care about. Nobody needs disengagement.

If you chose to steer away from your dreams and don’t dare to desire, you disconnect from the only thing you really need to make it happen, from the vital energy that fuels you. It doesn’t serve you. It doesn’t make your life better. And, probably you will regret it. A time will come, when the risks you see today will look so tiny, compared to the risk of quitting your true purpose. And there’s no special reward at the end of life for who opted for sacrificing their dreams.

So here’s my idea. Consider life as you wish you would have lived it in the end, and work backwards to build up your dream. It’ll help.

 

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